Don't Miss It
Usually the most difficult conversations happen with those you love most. In a relationship with a parent, a child, or a spouse, there exists a comfort and level of investment that may not exist in others. So, when tension arises, in any shape or form, it can logically feel uncomfortable.
Three years ago, the Lord opened a door for us to move back near our extended family after thirteen years away. To say that I was overwhelmed with gratitude and excitement would be an understatement. Over time, though, living in close proximity to our family on both sides proved more challenging as the natural boundary of distance disintegrated.
It recently became clear there was a shifting that needed to take place in my heart and I could feel it.
I texted, she responded, and we planned a time to meet.
As we each shared, God revealed, reminded, and restored. It became a gift of healing and reconciliation to carve out the time to talk, and if anything I wondered why it took so long.
I drove away thinking to myself, I am incredibly grateful I didn’t miss the opportunity to seek understanding. The season that I find myself in right now is one where every thirty minute block of time is designated for something. This block of time wasn’t planned for heart discussions, and yet it was exactly where I needed to be.
Sometimes the things we need the most are the things we can’t exactly plan. My plans can and do get in the away of what is best for me. So, I came home and wrote down these words.
Don’t Miss It
NYC - 2012
I think back to that season in New York City as a young mom wondering when this part of life was going to end, so that real life could begin. I was watching “everyone else’s life” move forward with children in their newly decorated four-bedroom houses, or traveling to places far and wide, and I didn’t have the context to relate.
In those days, I remember praying each morning, “God, don’t let me miss what you have for me here. I don’t want to stay in this season one day longer than I need to.”
When things didn’t change right away, I knew I had a choice. I could either be intentional to lean fully into those years, appreciating what was right in front of me, or I could wish them away completely, missing the meaningful, soul-shaping years that they were.
Don’t ask me why, but it took too many years to realize that those challenging years WERE part of my story. Those seasons, though they looked completely different than what I expected or desired, were seasons of my REAL life. Real memories were made. Real lessons were learned. Real relationships were forged.
And now, I want to remind myself the same thing. Though many of my pictures are more relatable, and many of my days less laborious than in those earlier years of motherhood… I still don’t want to miss it.
I don’t want to miss the gift I receive when my child interrupts for the umpteenth time.
I don’t want to miss the opportunity to extend or request forgiveness.
I don’t want to miss the lessons learned in a marriage that steadfastly walks through the most difficult of misunderstandings.
I don’t want to miss the heart connections that come at the end of a long day.
I don’t want to miss the moments shared over a meal because I feel rushed towards the next thing.
I don’t want to miss the area God wants to reveal and heal in my life during the most painful of circumstances.
I don’t want to miss the therapeutic laughter or vulnerable tears that come from time spent with my dearest friends.
I don’t want to miss the adventure that lies before me when I say yes to taking a risk, and doing something that doesn’t make sense on paper.
I don’t want to miss God speaking to me through His creation because I am too busy to notice or forget to look up.
I don’t want to miss the hard conversations, where layers are peeled back so deeply, you wonder if things will ever be the same.
Whatever that thing is for you, in this season, this is your REAL life. Don’t miss it.
God, I pray the eyes of our hearts would be awakened to your leading, your prompting, and your moving in our lives. I pray we don’t miss all that you have for us in a life that trusts your purposes in all things and above all things. Amen.